Sunday, July 31, 2011

Don't eat at our house

Seriously.  Today was one of my worst cooking days ever.
We threw some ribs into the crockpot last night, and added some barbecue sauce - hoping for some nice barbecued ribs after church.

Because we don't know anyone here, we invited some new people over for dinner - they just moved in last night, so we figured they might be hungry.

The ribs cooked all night, and were ready when we got home from church today.  Sort of.  They got a little over cooked, and the sugar in the barbecue sauce had burned and gave it all a bitter taste.
To accompany the ribs, we made fake flakes (potatoes)  (because I found a box of them in our food storage and they needed to be used, and we liked them back when we bought them).  Once they were made, I found they were stale.  Our guests had just pulled up, and I didn't have time for a plan B.  I made gravy.

We found a box full of jello mixes yesterday - last night I made cherry jello with bananas and whipped cream - my grandmother's old standard.  There isn't a lot you can do to kill jello.  I was relieved that at least something might be edible. Fresh fruit, carrot sticks, and broccoli salad - pretty tough to kill as well.  I figured if we just stuck to the sides, we might make it through.  

I was pretty uncomfortable with the meal, but past the point of being able to do much more to salvage it, short of peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, and they had a peanut allergy.

As soon as we sat down to eat, our guests let us know that his father is a professional chef, 'no pressure they added'.

I was really embarrassed.  Really.  And uncomfortable.  

As we began to eat dinner, our guest's 3 year old began to eat.
He shoveled the meat into his mouth and to my horror - began to vomit.  Yes, at the table.  We all scattered while his parents both tried to catch it in their hands.

That's apparently what my food will do to you.

Okay.  Not really.
After throwing up, he began calmly (the only calm part) to eat again.
He merely said, 'I put too much into my mouth'.
Except, his parents were the only ones who actually understood what he said.  That's what THEY said he said.

I wonder if I should believe them?

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